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I could tell her it was a gift I bought for her, but why? Her birthday wasn’t coming up. Neither was our anniversary or Christmas. So why would I buy her something and then not let her open it? I was screwed, and not in the way I hoped when I made the purchase. The agonizing trip finally came to an end and I was on my way home from the airport. As I made the drive, I actually wished the trip had been extended. I still didn’t know how to deal with this situation.I walked into the house and prepared for the worse. I was greeted at the door, however, not by an angry, upset wife, but by a smiling one. She gave me a big hug and a kiss and asked the normal “How was your trip?” questions. As I carried in my bags and engaged in conversation, I looked around the house. No box. Had it not come? Did it not ship yet? Was it lost in the mail? Who cares?! A feeling of relief came over me. My surprise purchase was not discovered and this could remain my little secret. The next day I went back to. I heard a voice. "Integration successful. Brain wave activity has stabilized. Patterns reflect consciousness."I heard foot steps. I turned my head to see a little fellow some three feet tall. He had two arms, two legs and a head. That's the closest he'd ever come to human. He looked like a beige egg with spindly limbs and a fat cylinder for a head. I wondered if it were an environment suit of some kind. It was partially covered in scrollwork and had a harness fastened around it."You are our twenty-seventh successful re-animation project. You were in storage for many centuries. The planet on which you were found has been depopulated by interstellar migration and later by ecological collapse. We believe that the time is now some sixty-thousand years past the time of your storage. Do you have any questions?" Yes. Two come immediately to mind. What is to become of me and my admittedly antique knowledge, and why the hell am I covered in hair?" Interesting. Several others first inquired as.
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