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”Darn, that was a tough decision to make. How bad could it be I thought? Some guys even join it, don’t they? Is not a man fucking me, is this beautiful woman for whom I lust so much. Darn, ok - I gave in —Ok I said, what do I do? I said, not feeling to certain of myself. She smiled. Get in all fours like a good doggy, and lower your ass. Ok, I did as I was told. I felt her put lubricant on my ass hole and then I felt the massive head of that thing touch my ass. My reflex was to tighten up and pull away; she commanded; don’t fucking move, relax...and then without warning gave a trust that must gone in maybe a little less than an inch...The pain was terrible, I screamed, pulled away, jumped out of bed, hopped around the room like a fucking rabbit complaining about the pain in my ass. She looked at me, laughing, and said... “will never fuck me again...”. I said, maybe we are not doing this right. What do you mean she asked? Well, when I fuck you in the ass, I first eat your ass, put my. .differnet. But, just as the interest springs forth, it quickly dissipates by the lack of desire to know anything beyond the physical strength and endurance that they possess.I've developed a checklist for each of the men I take to bed. A strict set of standards that have become sacred and imperative in order to maintain my self-imposed "lessons." Each partner must have the physical power to bring about the most pain, and have enough tolerance and virility to maintain long periods of terrifying foreplay before finally sating their own urges.I am not sure how or when I became a slave to sexual pain, but it's now more a drug for me than anything else. It brings about a high, as well as serving a much greater purpose to me. Each slash of the whip on my skin or jolt of pain across my cheek have become almost...euphoric. I feel closer to reality than I ever have, the anguish providing a sense of stability - something real to cling to that keeps me grounded. With only the physical and.
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