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" But?" But, I'm glad I didn't." Why Tommy?" Because really mum, I don't want to fuck you." Oh, I feel silly now." Well don't mum, I really don't want to fuck you." I took the cigarette away from her and stubbed it out when I held her again there were tears in her eyes."I don't want to fuck you mum, because I want to make love to you, I want to be stone cold sober as well as you when we do it."I slipped a hand round to her breasts and cupped one in the palm of my hand,"I want to feel every inch of me against you, inside you, I want to be in full control of my senses, I want to know that it's me you want and not a booze induced thrill that'll make us both ashamed the next morning."I felt the nipple rising in my hand and I teased it gently between my fingers."He fucked you mum, he never made love to you, do you think I didn't hear you crying? He used you like he'd use his fucking hand when you weren't there, well I'm not him mum, I'm me, Tommy and I love you, and I'm pissed now and. When he gets back to the stables, he thanks everyone for organizing the ride, and remarks “And I loved the mare you gave me, she handled herself beautifully.”His host looks perplexed. “But Sir, this horse is male ... a gelding, in fact!”“No, no, no,” President Trump replies, “she’s definitely a mare.”“Mr President, I assure you this is most definitely a stallion, sans a few bit of anatomy. Why are you sure it’s a mare?”“Well, when I was riding down the final straight all alone, I saw a kid in the crowd point in my direction and call out ‘Hey Dad, check out the big cunt on this horse’.”At a G8 summit, after a pretty contentious set of meetings, Presidents Trump and Putin go for a walk in the nearby woods to see if they can come to a personal agreement on the issues. As they’re walking along the path Jesus appears in front of them.They’re even more surprised when he says to them, “Gentlemen, you need to try harder to resolve your differences. Anything is possible if you put your minds.
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