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“Ms Johnson, I forgot to say thank you for washing my mouth out with soap. I do thank you. I really needed it and you were very good at it. I also want again to apologise for my language and behaviour.” During the car journey to the train station I explained the situation: “Alice, for the rest of the summer you are 9. You can be 18 if you want us to call the police about your latest crimes. Now as a 9 year old you will refer to me as Aunt Roberta and you will talk to your Aunt as Aunt Christine. For other adults you will say Mr or Ms or Dr or Reverend as the case may be. “You also need to know that my hair brush and the rest of the carbolic soap are in easy to reach hand luggage.” We had reserved three seats on the train. Where we sat there was a little table. Alice was sat next to the window and. I had missed my family, obviously. It hadn’t even been a week, but it was still good to be back. They were all there, waiting in the doorway as Ali opened the passenger door to me. I couldn’t wait for him to unload my suitcases and bugger off. I kissed Melody first, but I’m afraid I did it without taking my eyes off my lovely little boy.“DA!” yelled Edwin, who generally had something to say, even if he never picked the right number of syllables for the job.“You could at least look at her,” said Kate, thumping my arm while I kissed Mel and winked at Edwin. Kelly giggled.“It’s okay, I’ll have his full attention tonight,” said Mel, who stopped kissing me and handed me Edwin. His hands were covered in tiny red spots.“What’s this?!”“He had his vaccination last week. This is Rubella Lite. It doesn’t hurt, he just feels like a Braille book,” explained Mel.“You might have told me! Oh, poor boy! Look at you! You had skin like a peach when I left!”“I have peach-like skin,” said Kelly, who came.
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