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Thesecond the stone slipped from my fingers, the entire world blurredaround me. "Oh my god, no way..." I thought as all around me thingsshifted around from my dining room table to somewhere completely new.At the same time, I realized I was blurring and shifting myself. Oh,if I had thought it would really work I probably would have played"better safe than sorry," for I was about to have an incredible lifechange.My clothes seemed to melt off in to nothingness, and soon I was starknaked. I had almost immediately gotten an incredible erection, and Ialmost instinctively snaked my hand down towards it. Before it gotthere, the room shifted some more, and the chair I was sitting onsimply vanished. With a thud I landed on the floor, knees first.After a few seconds of disorientation from the fall, I realized that Icould feel my hair on my back, it had grown significantly in just a fewseconds.That wasn't all, I could see my arms had thinned, and all the hair onthem were gone when I. Has this here outside thingie that radios the temperature and humidity right into my house so I don't haveta get offa my ever enlarging tushie ta see it's too damn hot to go outside and knock around. Musta been a good present. Took the wife and me three days to get it working and then I had to have one of the boys help with it. Alla this new 'lectric stuff is like that. A three year old can just take it and make it go. Us old farts have to call them for help.Shit, look at my cell phone. Wanna make a phone call? Ok, fine. Push the button on the side. Slide yer finger across the front of it. Push the little phone button then tap the button of the man's head. Run your finger up the phone and watch alla the names go by until you find the one ya want. Tap the screen a coupla more times and the phone rings. Well that's the way ya do it unless you're in the car. If you're in the car just say, "Call Joe" and the mouthy bitch in the dashboard says "Calling Joe using Jim's phone."The wife.
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