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"Ann couldn't help but grin a little. "And it's true." Is not. But what's that got to do with all the tears, and why bring up the handmaiden thing?" But Arlene's mind was already weighing things that had happened lately, and she was beginning to worry. She took a breath, almost saying she didn't need or want a handmaiden. Besides, it was an outdated term, but she managed to stop before the words came out of her mouth. "I..." You get up in the middle of the night and go out to the Ship to study for your position, and sometimes you do it several times during the day. You train with Security, learning things that I don't know anything about. I am to you as you are to Jeff on the Ship. How can I protect you – help you – when you don't want me around you? We don't even study together anymore. Not since we moved into the new school. Oh, I can come sit with you, but you're always busy on some project or other. I miss being with you, doing things together..." She choked up before she could. After that the dance school held a cotillion. I wore a very frilly dress with white gloves and everything. Naturally, I had to dance with all the squeaky-voiced, pimply-faced boys ... just to remind me of EXACTLY what I had become. Ballet class wasn't too bad, just embarrassing. The moves were making me more graceful and feminine in my bearing, which is exactly what they wanted. In the mirror I saw a chubby young girl with the start of a woman's figure and perky, little tits bouncing merrily. They were beating the tough guy out of me by making me a helpless little girl. They were succeeding, too. To get over my bouts of depression I began to sleep with a dolly. After class I put on a pair of pink shorts over my leotard, some sneakers and put up my hair in pigtails. Now that I was a 'big girl', meaning I had breasts, I was allowed to wear some lipstick. In fact, they had been teaching me about clothes and make-up. The rest of the day, like all the previous days, was spent skipping.
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