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One… it was kind of scary looking at you and knowing that I desired you in every possible way. I had always thought of you as a little sister, and then out of nowhere you werent a little kid anymore. Jon may have had the title of my best friend, but you were the one I could tell anything to and the first one I wanted to tell everything to. Admitting those feelings to you meant risking you not feeling the same and then things not being the same ever again. When you started dating Dean, I wanted so badly to tell you and have you be with me instead of him, but I didnt want it to seem like I was only admitting those feelings because I didnt want you to be with him… So Dean was reason number two? He chuckled again, no, not exactly. Then what was it? Jon… Jon may or may not have threatened to castrate me if I did anything that could potentially hurt you… which is ironic because he vehemently refused to let me castrate Dean on the numerous occasions I offered to. Also ironic since he all. Of course until that fateful night I was afraid to ever approach him. It was a Thursday and I had gone to a friend's house. I called my father and told him she and I were going to go out and get a hamburger and thick shake for supper and I wasn't sure when I'd be home. "Okay," he said, "thanks for letting me know."What I told him was a lie. He knew I often had sex, but there was no need to rub it in. Our boyfriends had come over and we talked, drank wine and at least twice slipped up to a bedroom and fucked. When I came home my father was sitting in the living room reading a news magazine and I sat opposite from him and began reading a book; there would be nothing on TV until 8 o'clock. I looked across at my Dad and a perverted desire rose in me. I had always lusted for him even though I knew this was unnatural, but tonight I was high on wine and recent sex, my desire for incest became intense."Fuck it!" I said to myself, "Why not put it out in the open."But even with the alcohol, I.
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