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Q: What is a criminal lawyer?A: Redundant.Q: What’s black and brown and looks good on an attorney?A: A Doberman.Q: What’s the difference between a lawyer and a catfish?A: One is a slimy, bottom dwelling, scum sucker. The other is a fish.Q: Have you heard about the lawyer’s word processor?A: No matter what font you select, everything comes out in fine print.Q: How many lawyer jokes are there?A: Only three. The balance are documented case histories.Q: What’s the difference between a good lawyer and a great lawyer?A: A good lawyer knows the law. A great lawyer plays golf with the judge.Q: When lawyers die, why do vultures ignore them?A: Even a vulture has taste.Q: What is the definition of a shame (as in “that’s a shame”)?A: When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.Q: What is the definition of a “crying shame”?A: There were two empty seats.Q: What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?A: An offer you can’t understand.Q: Where can you find a good lawyer?A: In the. ‘For one thing, I didn’t tell you because I wanted to surprise you, but I got my raise. I’ll be getting another dollar an hour.’ ‘Jason, I can’t believe it! You’ve been trying for that raise for months! I’m so glad you finally got it, but still-‘ ‘For another thing,’ Jason continued, as though Dani hadn’t spoken, ‘we were talking about getting a minivan as soon as we found out you were pregnant with Melanie. So I’ve been putting some extra money in the bank every week, on top of the regular savings and the house fund. Since we bought the house, I’ve been able to put more away. We have almost two grand for a downpayment for this, plus the Z24. The payment will be about what we were paying for the Olds and the Z24 together, but since the Olds is paid off now, we won’t be paying any more a month than we have been. Dani, I want to do this for you. Especially if we decide to go through with what we were talking about last night. A mother of three needs a minivan, and this is the one.
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