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I could hear her getting up onto one elbow to look for me in the dark. ‘I don’t want to pick up any diseases from you,’ not being specific about just what kind of things I might be worried about, ‘I’m going to sleep in the guest room,’ I snapped back at her. ‘Oh, Jim. Don’t get all mad and huffy. Come back to bed, I’m sure its not something contagious,’ she pleaded. ‘If having sex tonight is that important to you, then come back and we’ll do it,’ continued my soon-to-be-ex girlfriend, with that slightly exasperated tone of voice that women get when they are dealing with men who are acting like selfish little boys. ‘Oh no, ‘ I replied, ‘I’m not making you into some sort of martyr about this.’ I walked towards the bedroom door. Standing in the open doorway, I turned back and in a more conciliatory tone, I continued, ‘I need to be out of town for a couple of nights, and I really need to be on my toes with these people. I would just rather not take a chance on coming down with some bug. So whatdo you want first?" World peace." World peace? World peace! I magically turn you into a character in agenre just left of porn, ("What?!" "Never mind") I turn you into abeautiful young woman, a horny beautiful young woman I might add, and youcan have literally pretty much anything you want, and what do you ask forfirst? A glorious sexual romp with the fantasy partner of your choice?No you ask for world peace! What the fook, lass!" Duty before pleasure. There will be time for fulfilling that kindadesire later. In fact, now I have something to look forward to and getslowly and thoroughly in the mood for, yeah? But right now I want worldpeace, got it!" OK, OK, you understand that one coin worth of leprechaun magic isnaegonna make much fookin' difference on the world peace front, right? Bigthings like that, especially abstract ones, the magic just kinda nudgeshere and pokes there and looks for subtle ways to help. Its the smallscale personal stuff that's really concrete.
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