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I was crushed." I watched his face cloud over – just briefly, but I did see the pain of betrayal from his experience."Frankly, I fled to New York, trying to put the pain behind me. My wife started playing games with visitation and basically cut off all communication with my daughter. To this day, I don't know why I agreed to relinquish custody, but I've regretted it since. So why did I wait once I found her? This entire situation was like reopening a very deep wound. I wanted her with me, but would she still love me or even accept me? This entire matter brought out all those feelings of loss of my marriage and my child. It was excruciating ... I guess I was terrified of reliving all that happened before. The shipwreck refocused me on what was important. I want my daughter with me, and that's what matters, not my selfish fears."Ryan looked at me for a few moments and then nodded and said, "I'm not the expert in these matters, I'm primarily a litigator and I do a lot of criminal stuff.. ‘Well also, YOU think about how it’s not this child’s fault either. He didn’t ask for this. God lets things happen for a reason. I’m not saying her being raped was good, but this child is still a gift. Any child is.’ Dr. Jennings sighed. ‘Very well then. You are her mother. You and Rose should talk about this and figure out what she wants.’ After getting dressed, Rose walked out into the lobby where Dr. Jennings was talking to Elaine. They both turned to look at her. ‘I’m ready to go home,’ Rose said softly. ‘Yes, come on Rosie,’ Elaine said eyeing Dr. Jennings. Once they were home, Elaine knew it was time to talk to Rose about her options. ‘Why not give it up for adoption?’ Elaine asked quietly. Rose shot her mother a look of rage. ‘Adoption? No! Mother, don’t you understand I do not want to carry this child in me? How can I let it grow in me? These horrible men raped me and now I have to have their child? No! I won’t do it!’ Rose ran to her room and fell onto her bed. She had her.
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