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So for the purposes of this story, I?m Rip. I figured the comment about ?using a little help?was a dig at my lack of contribution round the house and garden. ?Whaddaya mean ?? I repeated. I?m not eloquent when I?m drunk. Come tothink of it, I?m not eloquent when I?m sober either.I don?t recall her reply or the rest ofthe conversation. What I do know is that Diane ? her real name by the way ?took it upon herself to contact, interview and recruitour ?domestic slave couple? the very next day. Would you believe it.A wimp-dicked sub with the name of Short! True. I?ve seen his passport. Well, the passport?s locked in my safeactually. Peter Short. Damn his parents had a sense of humour! I won?t test your patience with a fuller description of him yet. It?s Sweet y?all wannaknow about, right ? Well, like my own name, I?ve takena bit of licence with hers too. It?s actually Candy but I figured that candy?ssweet. And ?Short n Candy? wouldn?t have sounded so good as the title of thisstory would. ” She got in the car. Inside, “Isn’t the conventional approach more of ‘promise the stars and deliver a lightbulb’?”I told her what movie I had in mind. “And I’d rather promise mediocrity and over-deliver.”“You’re a nut,” she laughed.“Gets you smiling,” I grinned. “Sort of the point.”“Why?”“You’re smart and funny and immensely better than sitting at home binge-watching NetFlix.”“Glad you think so.”We worked our way into the theater with a small herd, it being a weeknight, found a couple of seats midway back, and settled in.Settled. As in I didn’t have to insinuate my arm around her. She just sort of scooted next to me, raising the arm between our seats, and nestled. I liked it. That night when I dropped her off, that was the first kiss.“Thank you, Tommy,” she said. “You’re a rare friend.”I drove home, thinking that here I was, ‘friend’ again. So Saturday I was bringing a ‘friend’ on a date to the pavilion.Okay, Tommy, time to examine your motives. Are you doing this because YOU have.
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