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"Thinking about all the things we talked about. Worrying, I guess. Wanting it to change, or... wishing it were different." You can't change what's happened, hon."I yawned again. "No. I guess not." You're at a disadvantage, not knowing what a father is. I don't know myself what it means to have one, in the way most people do. But I am a teacher, and I did learn things that helped me. I don't know what I can be to you. I certainly can't replace the people you should have had. But I can teach you... if you promise me something."I rubbed my swollen eyes. "Another promise? Okay. What's the deal?" Promise that you'll accept the fact that you're not stupid, you're not ugly, you're not incompetent. It's just that -- and don't take this the wrong way, hon -- it's just that you have things to learn. Promise you won't beat yourself over the head for what you can't be." Easy for you to say," I told her dryly, and reached up to scratch a pimple under my chin.Martha gently pulled my hand away from. I decided the best thing to do would be to change the conversation to something more innocent before I did or said something I might regret.After dropping our passenger off we made to head back for our station. The weather was getting worse and Fitz couldn't stay awake so he drove to the nearest hotel, as it wasn't safe for us to continue. I was dreading it. A night alone in a hotel with Fitz; could I stay strong and faithful?We went to check in and could only get a room with 2 single beds in it. I thought, oh no if we share a room will something happen? As we entered the room we de-kitted, taking our stab vests and belts off. As this was a spur of the moment thing, we had nothing with us: No change of clothes, no nightwear, nothing. I excused myself and went to the bathroom, I needed a moment to think. How am I going to get through the night?I saw a bathrobe so decided to change out of my uniform leaving just my bra and thong on and put it over me. As I exited the bathroom, Fitz was.
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