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"I can get that cleaned," offered Steve brusquely as he stood proffering the recovered plate. "It's no bother. It was an accident. There, it's almost gone. A bit of cold water later and it'll be OK." Steve still stood holding out the plate. "I won't be needing that now, will I? She scolded indignantly as she picked some tiny gravely bits out of the exuding cream of a crumpled pastry puff."Here, you'd better give it to those squirrels."Steve shook his head stupidly. 'Of course, it was stupid to offer the spoiled food. No woman in her right mind would have eaten stuff off the floor.' That single action was an indicator of how far Steve had sunk in the slobbery scale. Buried deep in his researches, he had been livingsuch a slobbish bachelor existence he had virtually lost all contact with women. Indeed, he had almost lost all contact with his fellow man as he laboured away with his research.Since leaving high school, his whole adult life had been bound by the simple criterion. ’ Reverse Cowgirl * * * I yelled at Audrey Elaine, ‘Hurry up or we’ll be late for your graduation rehearsal!’ Audrey replied, ‘Cool it Mom—it’s only rehearsal and what’s the big deal? I’m only graduating from the eighth grade!’ Nancy shouted from her room, ‘Hey Mom, come here a second—please?’ I grumbled, ‘OK,’ and went downstairs to the kids’ wing. Nancy laughed, ‘Mom, Coach Jamie told me, ‘You were a pretty salty player back in the day.’—look what I found,’ as she held up the Sports page from the Dragons’ only State Championship, ‘Dragons Win State!’ Below the headline was an 8×10 picture of me putting the next ‘Jamie Thomas’ flat on her ass as I let fly the winning basket. I just grinned at my oldest daughter as she held up another Sports page from an old box of photographs and Sports pages, ‘State Romps Past University 104-52.’ The sub-heading read, ‘Freshman Sensations Andrews and Dobbier Lead the Way.’ I smiled as I read the first paragraph of the column, ‘State’s sensational.
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