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THIS was why I couldn’t work up the nerve to be alone with her and talk about our feelings, and hadn’t done so for the past year.No one else on the planet affected me like this. If she’d been anyone else – a friend, ex-girlfriend, co-worker, even family – I’d have no trouble opening my mouth and having it out. Awkwardness is best nipped in the bud, sorted out so that both parties know what the score is and where everyone stands. Every time, every situation in the past year that I found myself hesitating to take action and FIX the problem, the stupid voice in my head kicked me in the ass and got me into gear.I’m not stupid. I’m smarter than you, stupid. We had a deal: I remind you every time you try to sit on your hands and pussy out. You sack up and DO something about it.And I do. Except with Dawn. Visit the old Berkeley house? Chickened out. Thanksgiving with the Evanses? Always an excuse to not be alone with her. I couldn’t open my mouth, couldn’t go through with starting a serious. “I hope you liked it,” he said, “because I LOVED it!”And at that moment, I knew this wasn’t going to be the last time we got together. This wouldn’t be the last time I had that glorious cock in my mouth, and snaked my tongue into his ass. And who knows? Based on that look on his face, maybe I had a blowjob coming my way sometime too?I strolled home shortly afterward, having said goodnight to John and walking down his driveway as he closed his garage door again and went in for the night. About half way home I realized we never even pretended to move a heavy part for his truck. I chuckled. I felt light. Energized. Happy. I thought to myself, this could work. I’ve read about these setups. “Friends with benefits” they call it. Well hot damn, I thought. This neighborhood isn’t so bad after all.It wouldn’t be until the next day that I learned that I didn’t have things quite as figured out as I thought I did. The text message popped up on my phone around 3 in the afternoon: “Jack, you need.
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