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“Well does it feel weird to have your penis flopping around everywhere?” I asked Scott. I had only learned about sex-ed in school so I didn’t know much, although I had a general understanding of how boys were different than girls.“No, I guess not.” He replied“Well, then, it’s the same thing then. Do we really need to be talking about my boobs?” I seethed at him, turning even more red in the face.“I guess not.” Scott said and then paused.I could tell he wanted to say something else but for a couple of moments, we just sat there in silence.“I don’t think they’re going to find us here.” I said after a few awkward minutes.“Can you show them to me?” Scott blurted out“Show what? My boobs? Are you crazy?” I said to Scott“Yeah, c’mon! I’ve never seen boobs before and we’ve been best friends forever, right? Just show them to me quickly.” He said, licking his lips in a weird way that I hadn’t ever seen before.I really didn’t want to. At least I don’t think I wanted to. But I also didn’t want to. “Yes. Yes, I did. Go the blue, white and red!” he gleamed with pride.“When did you graduate?” I asked.“In 1975” He answered “Why do you ask?”“You were in my class!” I exclaimed.He looked at me closely. Then, that ugly, old, bald, wrinkled faced, fat-arsed, grey-haired, decrepit son-of-a-birch asked “Oh Really? What did you teach?”This group is compliments of a Friend of J & G.A man dies ‘in the act’ after taking Viagra and rigor mortis has set into his private parts.The funeral director can’t get the coffin lid nailed on and has to discuss the alternatives with the man’s beautiful young widow. “I’m afraid that the only way to get the lid on is either to pay another $3,000 for an extra-large coffin or to amputate his member”.“Well I have no more money” states the widow “and it is against my religion for me to bury my husband in more than one piece”.The funeral director thinks about this and then comes up with a brainwave: He’ll amputate his dick and then stick it up the deceased’s.
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