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He said that he is oneof the leading authorities in the field.He said he will see if they will see me as well as Russell they may beable to do much of my care on the NHS.He asked if I had any questions that I wanted to ask him.I asked if I had seen someone before I started on my present path if Icould have been helped over my depression. He said that the course I hadtaken was the only one open to me. The condition is not curable by whatby what is considered 'normal psychiatric practices'.I mentioned my Brother's suggestion of forgetting about myself andconcentrating on my family, seeing a psychiatrist, having testosteroneinjections and a mastectomy. He said that the suggestion wasthoughtless, cruel and made out of ignorance. The most likely outcomewould have been a complete breakdown or even suicide.I said that I already new that, that was the answer, but told my familythat I would ask for them.The consultation lasted about forty five minutes.At least I have it on good authority from. " Why?" God, don't you think I wish I knew?? God! If I knew that, I wouldn't be having these problems!"He was silent for a moment." ... I'm sorry," she said, "that was ... God. I'm frustrated. You can tell." She gave a short laugh. "Maybe getting laid would be the best thing for me." But not with him." No, maybe even with him." She had another image of his face hovering over hers, his body hovering between her legs, and squirmed with discomfort. "If I can get over it." Well," said David, regarding her with his unblinking green eyes. "I think that means you have a choice to make. Everything and everyone around you says you should be going for it ... All except your heart, your gut, your instinct, your subconscious—whatever you wanna call it. You can trust that part of you ... Or you can go with your intellect." Which one's right?" she asked.He shrugged, a gesture that said, Well, that's up to you, isn't it?This was such an unsatisfactory answer that she flung herself to her feet in.
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