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He promised excellent massage with a happy ending which intrigued me. The problem was he lived about 100 miles from me so getting away long enough to meet was going to be difficult. One day my wife announced she was going away for three days. I couldn't wait to get on the massage website and make an appointment. I left the masseur my messenger address so we could chat. We began chatting and discussing my forthcoming visit to get an erotic massage with a happy ending. The anticipation on my part was great and the time dragged waiting for my wife to leave. The day finally arrived and as soon as she left, I messaged my friend and said I could leave and it would take me about two to three hours to get to his place. He gave me his address and I programmed it into my GPS and headed his way. Since I had never had a massage, I was a bit nervous with anticipation. Upon arrival, after introductions, he ushered me into a back bedroom that had lights dimmed and classical music playing in the. ’ Then he fell asleep again.His wife had never heard him say that before, so she stayed by his side. A few minutes later his eyes fluttered open and he said, ‘You’re cute... ‘ The wife was disappointed because instead of ‘beautiful, ‘ it was now ‘cute.’She asked, ‘What happened to beautiful?’The man replied, ‘The drugs are wearing off.’A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, ‘I almost had an affair with another woman.’ The priest said, ‘What do you mean, almost?’ The Irishman said, ‘Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped.’ The priest said, ‘Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You’re not to see that woman again. For your penance, say five Hail Mary’s and put $50 in the poor box.’ The Irishman left the confessional, said his prayers, and then walked over to the poor box. He paused for a moment and then started to leave. The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him saying, ‘I saw that ... You didn’t put any money.
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