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My feelings tended to be scattered. I was excited, nervous and scared all at the same time. My desires for him grew, the more I thought about it, the more my body took over. I’ve spent more and more time with him at his house the past couple of months. I was learning everything I could to please him.I was lost in thought kneeling at his side. A woman walked into the room and stated that dinner was served. He stood up, reached for my hand and walked us into the dining area. He sat next to me.As we sat there and ate, he asked if I had any questions for him.“Yes. What do you get out of this type of relationship, Sir?” I asked timidly.He looked at me saying, “I get the precious gift of submission, your heart, soul, mind and body are mine to love, protect and use. I get your complete trust. Your loyalty. When I do an action, you will feel it. Your emotions distilled through your experiences will go directly to me, thanks to the devotion and connection we have. We register the tiniest of. Isn't it?The aftermath's questions scourge her raw, as if to say, Not like this.December 2016 - August 2018After returning from a healing hiatus of her own, she's stunned to find he's there, bearing poetic gifts of contrition.Though the comeback causes a storm of mixed emotions, she's gotten over him and is capable of being civil, even forgiving. His explanation for the sudden disappearance is a satisfactory one. She concedes it was all for the best; she's met someone she wouldn't have otherwise.Convinced of having achieved cordial closure, they wish each other happy holidays.But old habits die not at all. Careful platitudes inevitably slide the reminiscent slope toward ecstasy in its superlative. Months of deprivation are obliterated in a flash fire's rebirth.It's meant to be, she tells and touches herself, breathless with the kind of high she didn't think she'd ever feel again.The sense of serving as his backstage gratification blurs her edges, even opens her to a roomful of.
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