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” I nod yes, and she orders the girls to measure us. While they work she pulls out a pad and pencil to make numerous sketches.After shaking her head no over the first dozen or so drawings before flipping to the next page and starting again she smiles, and starts to work longer on the one on the current page. The girls finish measuring all three of us, so we stand around chatting on minor matters while we wait for her to finish her drawing. With a big smile she shows me a drawing of a traditional style samurai court dress with a few changes. Instead of the baggy style pants often used these are more western looking pants with straighter sides. The top is full traditional, so is the obi. My daisho and tanto will be in the normal places, while the tsurugi is to be carried in my left hand. The pants are the colours of a tiger while the top is white with appropriate symbols on it in black and tiger yellow, plus the under shirt will match the pants. The obi is to be striped like a tiger’s. “Pa? Nope, he left a’fore Ma came in,” said the kid.“Well, is your mother there?” persisted the social worker.“Ma? Nope, she left just a’fore I got here,” said the kid.“But,” protested the social worker, (thinking that surely she would need to intervene in this situation)“Are you never together as a family?”“Sure, but not here,” said the kid through the door. “This is the outhouse!”This one is compliment of the watertownkidA couple was having dinner in a posh restaurant, enjoying an exquisite meal. As they were eating the main course, a beautiful redhead sauntered to the table, leaned in a whispered something in the husband’s ear, giggled and then trailed her hand across his face and neck as she swayed away.The wife hisses, “Just who was that?”The husband replied, “My mistress.”“You bastard. I’m going to divorce you.”“As you wish, dear. But I have great lawyers. You’ll do OK but you won’t be living in the Palm Beach waterfront mansion or in the mountain estate. You won’t be riding in.
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