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It didn't work. It only made me more vulnerable to Brian. It made it easy for him to get me to sleep with him even though I really didn't like him. I knew he was one of those men who think every woman is a "score," and who feel nothing for the woman as a human being. I knew he was a scummy thing to begin with and I knew it every time I let him do things to me.Doctor Jamison and I think that I was degrading myself to bring myself down to where I figured I would be equal with my Mom and Dad and Aunt Ruth. They were the all of my life for so long. I guess something inside me was saying they were the best I could be and so I tried to be them. It wasn't working; I knew better from being around my dear husband and daughter. That was why it was tearing me up. It was hard breaking that conditioning but I'm here finally.We also found out that a part of me thought Alyssa was a rival for Mark's affection. That was stupid but it made me feel resentful whenever she and Mark were around me. Doctor. The crack rang out loudly and the impact radiated deeply, and he didn’t stop. He struck the same spot again and again with firm stinging swats. I briefly thought of the delivery person, walking past our bedroom, and up the long walk to the front door. SMACK. I breathed in sharply as another shocking swat landed over the dying embers of the last one. SMACK. ‘Oh, he has to be hearing this.’ I thought. SMACK. I flushed as I wondered if he knew what we were doing by the sound alone, or if the idea would ever occur to him. I wondered how many other couples were tucked away tonight, warm and toasty, enjoying unspeakable acts of passion and pleasure. SMACK. I struggled to hold back the yelps and squeals that desperately fought to escape my tightly closed lips. I didn’t want to make it any more obvious that someone was spanking my ass for the pure fun of it. “Oh!” His hand fell again and again, the deep burning approached intolerable. “Aaaah!” I couldn’t hold back anymore. “Oooww!” The heavy.
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