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I don’t want to give this illness one bit of credit for anything but it’s destructiveness in my life. I have learned there are levels of pain that I never knew or even dreamed existed. I learned how a disability changes the way people perceive you. I know what it is to be pushed past the point of giving up. A place where you pray to die and mean it. I have been humbled and humiliated. It’s horrible.While it has wreaked havoc in my life I did manage to see some good and learn a few things. It is easier for me to be around disabled people now, especially those who are autistic because we are more similar than not. Simple pleasures are very important. When your mind is cotton or a piece of taffy somebody is pulling it’s hard to focus on a goal that is a year down the road. A bowl of soup, that’s just a few minutes away. It fills your mouth with a burst of warm flavors and fills your belly making you feel good. Soup is important in my life now.Kindness is more important to me, both giving. .. why would you think I have something in common with this?" Because your guy act isn't as good as you think." I... I guess there is a bit of a feminine side to me." If you say its only a bit." Look, you have gone out looking like that? Were you not scared?"(Maybe at first. But the secret to dealing with fear is to just do whatyou think you need to. And don't let the fear stop you. Besides, thereare a few safe places for people like me. Here. I have some magazinesthat show that you are far from alone. It includes the places we hangout." These are... adult mags." You are close enough. I hope it helps you."Nine months ago ..."I am sorry David, he is gone." Dead, John? How can Alex be dead? I didn't even know he was sick." It happened really fast. That's all I know. Because we are not family,I couldn't find out any more." It doesn't seem real." I know. I can't believe he is gone either. I am going to miss him." me too, John. I just wish I could have at least said goodbye." Me too David..
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