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"He paused long to take a breath."How do you plead?"From a loud speaker behind John and the girls came a female voice saying, "Guilty Your Honor."Immediately they all started shaking their heads."For the crime of lesbianism I hereby sentence you to reconditioning. And for the charge of terrorism I further sentence you all to pacification."John and the girls tried struggling and voicing their innocence, which only succeeded in getting them all hit with the shock stick."Sentence to begin immediately! Next case!"Before the reality of what just happened could even sink in, they were all ushered out of the courtroom and into a holding cell."Well, well, well," said one of the court guards, "aren't you bitches the lucky ones. You're all being shipped off to Dixon Conditioning Center."John and the girls continued to struggle against their handcuffs and gags. John desperately trying to convey the fact that he wasn't a lesbian or a terrorist. The rest of the group because they knew what. Same with small pieces of furniture, paintings, basically anything he can get for a few bucks and destroy with his shotgun. It’s hilarious. And it’s how I learned to shoot, or rather how I learned to shoot without killing or crippling myself. Lesson number one: shooting is loud. Very loud. If we all shot people like they do in the movies we’d go deaf in an instant and spend the rest of our lives battling with horrible tinnitus. Lessons two and three are basically the same, but they focus on toes and bystanders rather than ear drums. Only at around lesson four did Wayne discuss what happens when you actually get shot, which he seemed to consider far less likely and far less dangerous than hearing loss. So I learned that lesson well and the rest of it is mostly about not being an idiot and learning how much of a kickback you get from various sorts of weapons, or burning yourself on the barrel. There are a lot of ‘hilarious’ clips on YouTube featuring people who knock their own teeth.
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