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I could see there was a question in her mind, and I had a shrewd idea as to what it was.“Was Cal THE Cal?” she asked, “your Cal?”“I don’t know about my Cal,” I replied, “but she’s the only Cal I know.”“And you’re still nice to her after what she did?” she asked.“She and her mother live next door, our mothers are best friends, we’ve been best friends since we were five,” I replied, “it would be difficult to be nasty to her.”She looked at me for a long moment.“You still love her, don’t you?” she asked at the end of it.That marked my turn to think, and I did. Did I still love her, or was the idea of loving somebody what I was stuck on. The short answer was that I didn’t know. What I did know is that she was right, I did still love Cal, but I wasn’t in love with her. She’d shattered that on that night in Munich. The problem was, then and as I sat there thinking about it, the trust issue. I wasn’t going to start playing the if only game, but that trust had been destroyed.I looked back at. The weight was falling off me. By week 5 I decided to venture into town. I kept a low profile and brought food supplies to last another month. I then wandered into a computer store and brought a laptop with internet access. My final trip that day was to the gun store where I brought a good semi auto 7 mm rifle and a 9mm Sig P228 and plenty of ammunition for both. The store was also a pawn shop so an old boxing bag and gloves went into the buy pile. As I was driving back to the cabin, I saw a sign outside a house saying ‘puppies for sale’ so I went in. The lady had one Border Collie puppy left. I missed my old dog and had to admit a companion would help with the lonely days plus would also be a good early warning system. I soon had a 3 month old puppy I named Jess as well as her remaining puppy food. So I loaded both up and hit the road to get back to the cabin before dark. I arrived back at the cabin, set up my purchases and fed my new dog. After dinner I jumped on the internet and.
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