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Evangelism: Shit Happens (Pass it on).Evolutionism: The world is getting shittier all the time.Existentialism 1: Shit doesn’t happen; shit IS.Existentialism 2: What is shit anyway?Existentialism 3: There is nothing except shit happening.Existentialism 4: Shit happening is absurd.Existentialism 5: I shit, therefore I sit.Expressionism: Excrement comes and goes.Family gathering: Relatives are shit.Fascism 1: Shit won’t happen if we kill everybody that’s different.Fascism 2: Shit makes the trains run on time.Fatalism: Oh shit, it’s going to happen!Feline-ism: Shit happens ... bury it.Feminism 1: This shit happened before, and WE won’t clean it up!Feminism 2: Shit isn’t funny.Feminism 3: Why does shit only happen to women!?Feminism 4: Put the seat back down, you little shit.Feminism 5: Men are shit.Fetishism 1: I love it when shit happens.Fetishism 2: If shit happens, go for more.Ford-ism 1: Our shit is Job One.Ford-ism 2: Have you had a shit lately?Fortean-ism: No shit??Freudianism 1:. I called her and introduced myself, and we chatted for a few minutes."So, Sean, you were the referee at my son's game. I was really impressed with how well you were able to communicate with the kids. Kip is seven and his brother Davey is eight, and they both say they want to learn how to play better. Would you be interested in helping them? I'll be glad to pay you by the hour." Sure, Mrs. Wilkinson, I'll be glad to help them."And so arrangements were made. The Wilkinsons lived about half a mile from my house, so I agreed to meet the boys that afternoon at their house to start their lessons.After lunch, I loaded up my gear in a backpack and rode my bike over to their house. I rang the bell, and a lady answered the door."Yes? Oh, hi Sean. I remember you from my sons' game. I'm Lori Wilkinson. Come on in and meet the boys."I was a little shocked that this person was really Mrs. Wilkinson. She looked to be barely into her twenties. She was about 5'6" tall, slender, with light brown hair.
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