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"How the fuck are you still a virgin?"I stared at her. "What?" I asked, "I haven't had time, between school and watching out for you."She looked at me. "Sorry I've ruined your social life," she said."No, Val, that's not what I was talking about. I just meant that I've had too much on my plate to worry about scoring." Oh my God," she laughed, "that term is so ridiculously out of date." See? I'm so out of the loop that I can't even get my euphemisms right." I smiled at her, and she smiled back."You know, Josh, I could help you get ready," she said. "I know a lot about sex." Sorry, but I'm not having sex with my sister." I wanted to smack myself when I said that - of course I wanted to have sex with my sister!"Bullshit. Take your pants off." I was glad she said that, to be honest, but I couldn't let the "decent brother" act down quite yet."Val, no, I can't - "She gave me a wicked look. "You can and you will. Take them off now."I did as she said, going one step further and pulling my. ” Pause. “I know I’ve been saying that for months but I will, I promise.”OK, I know it’s rude to eavesdrop. But would you have done anything different? The words, “Of course I love you, silly,” hit me like a hammer blow. I went into the kitchen and poured myself a glass of wine, then put that to one side and poured myself a fucking great brandy instead. I sat at the kitchen table and thought, tears running down my cheeks.Wanda’s voice from the doorway, “Brandy? At four in the afternoon?”I had my back to her. “I don’t think I’ve ever cum so hard,” I said.“When was that, love?”“No, darling, not even with her.” My memory is pretty good. “I know I’ve been saying that for months but I will, I promise.”There were a few cliché moments after that. Cliché numbr one: retaining my dignity as one would expect I turned and hurled the glass of brandy at her. Class, no? Then cliché number two when she said I had misunderstood. Like fuck I had. Cliché number three when I mimicked her saying, “Your.
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