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Starting in March, we’d be partners, and we’d have no choice but to be with each other, in a very close relationship. Anything else would incur the wrath of Sensei Jim. The problem was, Jolene wasn’t sure she could handle it.She’d told me that she desperately wanted to make love with me. Not fuck, but make love. I could do that without causing myself any issues, but I didn’t think that Jolene could. For her, such an act would be equivalent to a commitment to a romantic relationship, something she also desperately wanted, but something that simply wasn’t possible for me to do.It wasn’t that I didn’t like Jolene a lot, but I didn’t have any romantic feelings for her. Even if I hadn’t been with Kara and Jessica - well, just Kara now - I couldn’t have a romantic relationship with Jolene because I didn’t feel that way about her. I did care for her, but I didn’t love her like I loved Jessica, Kara, Elyse, Jennifer, or for that matter, Kathy and Bethany.And that was the thing - I still. You were my best friend and I didn't want to screw it up. Or I just didn't have the nerve to ask."I remember being jealous of the boys you went out with. I remember wondering if you ever thought about me that way when I was a kid. I guess the simple answer is that I was too stupid to ask you out."We were quiet for a minute or two. Then I asked, "Would you have said yes if I asked?"She chuckled, shook her head and replied, "I don't know. I remember being very confused about my feelings for you. I liked you more than any of the other guys. But you were my boy friend, not my boyfriend. I liked that. I always felt comfortable with you. I could talk about anything with you. I didn't have to worry about how I looked or what I said. I'm not sure I could have given that up."But I felt the same way you did about you dating other girls. I remember being furious with you when you were head over heels in love with Sharon Straub. If you ever heard the things I called her behind your back while.
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