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I suffered in silence as comfort as my hair covered body only sickened me.When I tried to shave my body I only ended up cutting up my legs and nearlyslitting my wrists open. I only had the Saturday Morning cartoon with themale characters hairless body as some comfort as I wished I could be ashairless as them. When swimming my teenage feminine modesty had me wanting tokeep my chest covered with a shirt even if I didn't have breasts to be modestabout.I tried to fit in with stuff like boy scouts with my friend Jason but wish Icould join Missy in her girl scout uniform as she sold cookies.When I turned 18 it was the happiest time. My graduation gown was the closestthing to a dress I wore since I outgrew mom's skirts. When returning from mygrandparents I tried to explain to mom my feelings that I always felt but shedidn't understand the differences in TG lifestyles anymore than I did at thetime. She bought me a series of gay lifestyle books trying to understand me,but only drove me to the. I had to take a message to one of my aunts on the way to school. I emerged from Aunt Mary’s front gate to find Nicola with her back against the garden wall, and in front of her a large dog growling. She was crying and terrified, and the dog sensed her terror. There was no dog owner in evidence. At that time we had a dog, and I knew what to do. I strode confidently up to the animal and shouted at it in as gruff voice as I could manage. I think I told it to go home. Its tail went down between its legs and it slunk off. ‘You OK?’ I asked. ‘Yes thanks,’ she said giving me a grateful smile. We fell in step and I walked with her to school. We talked about our families, where we lived, and school. The dog was not mentioned. When we reached the school gates, she said offhandedly, ‘If I come by your place tomorrow morning — walk in with me?’ ‘OK.’ No more was said. I got some grief from my mates, but I realised they were jealous and told them so. So began a routine that continued throughout.
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