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Surprisingly she has not started to menstruate and I have had discussions with the women from both villages. Seemingly continuous and ever-more frequent discussions as I am feeling woefully unprepared for this. She has more questions than I can sometimes answer comfortably. But, we have an established commitment to openness and honesty. And also a full acceptance and tolerance for each other when in that open conversation things sometimes become awkward and clumsy. We don’t become defensive or easily offended. When you think about it that is an amazing relationship for a young woman and an adoptive mother (for all practical purposes that is what I am).Our swims in the morning and talks by the edge of the ocean is a saving part of our existence together. These times are personal, just for us, just “women talk” as I started referring to them. And it is becoming more and more apparent that it truly is becoming just that. I find I think of her and react to her more as a woman than a girl. .. voluntary. I mean when it's one partnerthat wants the change. Usually it's the man who wants it, and the womangoes through with it as well, those who swamp if you will, they areobjectively four times as likely to stay together, and subjectivelyhappier than those who don't." You mentioned someone did it for professional reasons, what aboutthem?" There's only been two cases of that, both times it was the woman thatinitiated the change..." Like us?" The words hung cold in my mind as soon as I uttered them."Yeah, in the case where they swapped, they stayed together. When theydidn't they didn't." Not much of a sample set," I scoffed."No it isn't." Her voice sounded sad, not tense, not desperate, justsad."It probably won't come up. You said a twenty percent chance." No, probably not," she whimpered.We sat in silence for the next hour, until I had to get up to go to thebathroom, and then I went to bed. She got up and joined me. We kept ourdistance from one another, tried to pretend the.
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