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‘You give it a shot,’ she urged him. ‘I’m sure it’s harder than you make it look,’ Jacen protested as he took a few steps forward. ‘Nobody expects perfection on the first stab,’ Star reassured him. ‘Just take a jab and we’ll see where you stand.’ Raising his weapon up, Jacen chose a spot on the tree and stabbed at it. Pulling back, he looked into the hole he had created and counted the layers he had traversed. ‘How bad?’ Star asked, when she saw the look on his face as he turned around. ‘Six layers,’ Jacen said sheepishly. ‘Had that been an enemy, he’d be dead,’ Star said, smiling. ‘That or in tremendous pain on his way to death. Either way – you need to control yourself a bit more. Try it again.’ Jacen took another shot, with slightly improved performance: four layers instead of six. A few hours of coaching and several trees later, Jacen was finally boring single-layer holes into the side of trees like an expert. ‘I’m impressed,’ Star said, examining Jacen’s last round of stabs.. I explained that somewhere in there, so long ago, was an early trigger for my hidden darkness. That little girl, and I, had suffered such horror and pain at 10 years old. She reassured me that she was much more qualified to deal with victims than perpetrators. Ahhhh, then I realized what she had meant all along.I only broke down a little bit in going over the details. She offered me a glass of water. I happily took this proffered drink. She let me go on as I related the details which seemed so fresh after 43 years in hiding.She knew where I had been a year ago. She knew we had covered many topics. Some hard. Some silly. But never as dark as this.We both were able to conclude this was no dream. Not some sudden variation of the same.I was able to show actual fear at the vision I had seen. The poor, helpless girl, laying in the pit while they lowered me onto her. She looked different. At 10, I had no concept of the difference. I was terrorized that perhaps they were going to cut me off.
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